well i must say guys. i am proud of myself. i have gone so far since i began uni. even just last year, i would have been bricking myself doing what i just did... enough to have risked injury and sprinted away... the roads i have just been on were. DARK. to my left was the start of the Forest of Bowland, sky's filled with fine pelts of rain, covering me with a blanket of wet, barely able to see my feet or hear my footsteps over the wind. eyes glare at me, mysteriously through the fields... all the time, im trying to focus on the fact that im not A person running on this world, but i AM the world, im the same as a sheep, the wind, the grass, bits of universe dust ha-ha. seriously though, people such as Jack Kerouac in On the Road speak of it, Robert Pirsig in Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintainance, Thoreau, Emmerson and so on. talking about being at one with it all. i notice in older tribes and cultures of the world, the people thank the ground they walk on, the weather, they thank their bodies even for allowing themselves to travel and live in the world. as far as im concerned, a little mouse in the fields beside which i ran, have souls, they're amazing! they're alive, with little bodies, emitting little specks of heat, eyes that see and noses that smell. now i have been all romantic on your asses, i want to speak about the run i just did... though i could romanticise all day, the true facts are, that running in the fells at night is practically suicide without company! safety really IS in numbers out there. the reality doesn't hit you while your at home comfortable reading this on your screens, tea in hand. we can KNOW in theory how tough the going really is, but as soon as you get out there, you realise how vulnerable to the elements etc you really are. the blackness engulfs your entire perimeter... i find the hills scarier than the forests, by far, it seems nothing lives there, it feels barren and empty, like everyone has left.
i dont think i will attempt to run in the lakes alone at night, it just seems i will be taking way too much of a risk, and believe me, i take them, im not one to usually take myself up on the self delusion of scaring yourself out of ever doing anything, thats the sort of attitude that keeps us in the house where we feel safe, watching telly and surfing the net, but in this case... i realise and did before i started this training, that Fell running can be suicidal. after all, people always speak of running as being primal and the like, but is it in our nature to run at night on mountains? can you imagine a cave man out running on the mountains at night? no... it goes against our instincts that have served us extremely well over the last few hundred thousand years...
so how will i practice in the dark for the 100 miler? i think i got it sussed... join a fell running club, do it in groups. after all, i will have to do it, as its included in the race... and just because i find it dangerous and scary, doesn't mean i don't enjoy it, i just had an awesome run in my swanky Lycra bottoms, i did, i enjoyed every minute of it, and even more so did i enjoy getting through it!
my muscles are growing, tougher and stronger, ligaments strengthening, back feeling amazing and arse feeling sexy as hell... joke ha-ha. im coming on well! im more alert than i have been in the last few years, im full of energy, and feel strong.
im enjoying training at the end of the day also. its 2.00am at the minute and i have just finished. i have been getting up early, going to uni all day doing art, then working until 11.30pm then going running.
and im not taking any short cuts!
the Lycra really, REALLY do help, they're so comfortable.
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